Dear Julia
Notes: Having watched Alias 3.11: Full Disclosure, I'm wondering - what were the writers smoking? The only way to explain that episode (which is so wildly out of character for Syd) is to say it didn't happen. Maybe it was Kendall's dream. Of course, then we still need a (relatively) reasonable explanation for what happened in those two years...
This ficlet was a writing exercise for me - could I explain everything that happened in season 3 up until "Full Disclosure" without violating canon as established up to that point? And could I keep Sydney's actions in line with her character? (Unlike "Full Disclosure" - she didn't even talk to Vaughn? Please.)
Dear Julia,
Or whoever you are. I suppose I'll know soon? Doctor Wong says this memory treatment will return the memories I lost almost two years ago, but I may lose a few of the newer memories. I'm writing this letter so I'll remember what happened.
I woke up one morning in a cell, laying on a bare mattress so thin I could feel the cracks in the stone floor through it. The pain - well, it doesn't matter. I had been tortured, I knew that. From the marks on my arms and legs, I knew electro-shock treatments had been a part of it. Funny, I couldn't remember my own name but I could identify the kind of torture I'd been subjected to by examining the marks on my body.
It wasn't over. The memories have blurred but I know the torture continued. So many questions - I didn't recognize anything.
Finally they believed I had amnesia, and locked me up. I don't know how long I was left in that place. The cell was lit by a single bare lightbulb and meals arrived sporatically so I had no way to track the time that passed.
One day they came for me. They broke me out of that cell and said they'd been searching for me for months. I worked for them, they said. I was a high-level operative, specializing in assassination. My name was Julia Thorne.
I believed the Covenant at first. It fit the knowledge I had. Holding a gun felt natural, like coming home.
Until the first time I looked down the sights of a sniper rifle and saw my victim's face. I don't know who he was. I just knew it was wrong. I'm not a killer.
Or am I? I had a reputation, I know that. Was that all part of their game? Or did I really kill people for money?
I hunted for any clues to my identity, and I found them. A file on Julia Thorne, killer. The Covenant's database held records of unspecified missions going back eight years. And a photo.
She did look a little like me, especially with the blond hair, but not enough to fool anyone. Guess she was pretty shy. Anyone who had met her face-to-face would never have confused us.
I didn't know what to do - the Covenant wouldn't let me leave, and I couldn't kill people on their orders. And they had a new assignment for me. Rambaldi. I didn't know who he was, but I remembered the name - it had been one thrown at me when I was under torture. I joined up with a man named Simon Walker and his team to retrieve an item. The plan involved the murder of a Russain diplomat.
I contacted the man, Lazarey, and we came up with a plan - we'd fake his death, his son would inheirit the bulk of his money and he would retire to an island in the South Pacific. He'd made more than a few enemies in his time, and this way he could start fresh. He'd live, the Covenant would get a counterfeit item, and I'd get a chance to learn more about my past.
The "assassination" and heist went as planned but things fell apart when I returned to the Covenant. The counterfeit was discovered almost immediately, and the blame fell on me. Not my best day. But, hey, any fight you walk away from is a good one, right? Even if you walk away with a major gut wound.
I went into hiding for a while after that, but I couldn't stay hidden long. I had too many questions. I found out everything I could about Rambaldi (see my notebook) but it didn't tell me who I was.
Finally, I tracked down Lazarey. He was my only link to Rambaldi. Unfortunately, I'd been followed. The Covenant had been using me to track Lazarey and find the box they wanted. We escaped, but he lost his hand in the fight.
He's entrusted me with the box now, but I can't trust myself. I've put the box in a safe place and come to Hong Kong for this memory treatment. Once I know more about my past I can retrieve it. Lazarey is the only other person who knows where I put it.
I'm sending this letter along with my notebooks to the only person I can trust. I met him while researching Rambaldi - he's pretty much an expert on the subject. If you can't decipher my notes, he can help you. He's also supposed to water my plants while I'm away.
I hope this works, and I hope this letter is unnecessary. I didn't tell Arvin about the treatment because I knew he'd object. The risks are high, but I need to know who I am.
- Me
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